Since before the invention of the camera phone, or even the camera, man has been determined to convey their own image. From those early days of caveman drawings, we've come a long way in the strange, insipid need to have physical evidence of our being. But was it a step in the right direction?


I'm going to level with you — I really don't like selfies. I just don't feel any desire to document myself doing, well … anything. It's not one of those situations where I'm some asocial asshole that rejects everything that all of my basic peers are doing. I'm actually a very social asshole with plenty of basic friends. But every time that they send me snaps of them doing mundane things or they gather around for the infamous group selfie (goddamn you, Ellen DeGeneres), I feel hollow inside. Why? Why are these selfies so intrinsic to your being?


Is it that deep-seated fear of the oblivion awaiting you, making you feel some sort of desperate need to take a picture of every insignificant thing you do? Is this the only way you can even feel alive anymore? Has the easy accessibility of cameras in these modern times turned us all into the mythical Narcissus, obsessing over our own image to the detriment of truly living our lives? Do you really just like how you look with a sepia filter? It's so basic, you guys!

I mean, it's not like I'm afraid of cameras. I don't mind them — I won't make a fuss when other people take pictures of me, and clearly the fact that I write for a newspaper means I LOVE getting attention. I just don't really put any effort to take pictures of myself. At home, there aren't any pictures of me at all since I was 12 (which might have more to do with me being the least-loved child, but that's enough of my family issues for one blog), and when I got Snapchat (waaaay after it was normal to have Snapchat) I mostly just used it to send written messages in response to the pics others sent me (to all my friends on Snapchat, I am so sorry). I am not a selfie person.


It's not that I loathe selfies, or anything. You can take 100 pictures of your latest outing to the mall and at most I'll just silently judge you. It's just that I wonder how you don't get a growing sense of dread over the sheer repetitiveness of it all. Like, most of you even have the same faces in your selfies, too. The only thing that changes is the background! What is it that makes you want to go on?


Maybe I'm wrong, or I'm just overthinking this (just kidding, of course I'm overthinking this). But think of all the time you waste taking selfies, and whether all the photos are really worth it. Let's be honest — you're not that attractive. 


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.